Invisible No More

I used to feel invisible all the time. Now I only feel invisible when I spend too much time focussing on myself. I wrote this piece as a reminder to myself that I was never alone. God has a purpose for everything that happens to me and He is eager to use it to reveal His hand at work in this world.

She was invisible but if she wasn’t, you would have seen a beautiful baby girl being born in a small town hospital. What you can see is an overwhelmed mother who hates the pain of childbirth, who has too much responsibility and who is filled with a lot of pain herself.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t, you would see a little girl trying to help the adults in her world so they would realize she wasn’t a mistake after all. What you can see is a  preschool girl helping her dad shingle the roof.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you see a school aged girl trying to make friends at school. What you see is other children teasing her about her crossed-eyes while she puts her head down to hide her sadness.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you would see a teen-aged girl helping out a friend. What you do see is a predator taking advantage of her innocence.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you would see a university student never feeling quite good enough. What you do see is a university student studying 10 hours a day everyday without taking a break driven to succeed.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you would see a young adult getting more and more frustrated with her inadequacies, because she has unrealistic expectations of herself and others. What you do see is a frustrated teacher with unrealistic expectations of her students.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you would see an adult in her late 20’s tired of trying to cover the pain, but unable to give herself permission to feel. What you do see is a teacher working from early dawn until late into the night.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you would see her longing to be loved and accepted for who she is. What you do see is a teacher living in isolation only letting people near her if she feels needed.

She was inviisible, but if she wasn’t you would see her looking at God and asking Him why she feels so empty and lost. What you do see is a 30 something woman, reading a book with tears streaming down her cheeks.

She was invisible, but if she wasn’t you would see her desperately wanting to please God, but feeling like she never measured up to His standards. What you do see is a seminary student who is attending classes and listening to her fellow students because they seem to know so much more than her.

She is invisible,but if she weren’t you would see that she prays and cries for the First Nations community God has called her to. You would hear her pleading with God to reveal Himself in bigger and more powerful ways than she has seen so far. What you do see a teacher starting over with a new passion for making life better for her aboriginal students.

She is invisible, but if she weren’t you would see a mother fighting with her own selfishness, you would see her heart crack as she learns to love another human being more than she ever dreamed possible. You would hear her tell God she is beginning to understand His love for her. What you do see is a mother baby proofing her house, conducting daycare interviews and working from 6 to 10 while someone else takes care of her gift.

She is invisible, but if she weren’t you would see a mother waking up to realize that her baby is now school age. You would hear her begging God for a second chance to be a better mother. What you do see is a single mother working part-time in order for her to have more time and energy to give her daughter.

She is invisible, but if she weren’t you would see a mother holding her breath and examining her heart. You would hear her telling God that she doesn’t have the kind of love He is asking her to give. You would hear her tell God she is afraid of failing and worse yet she is afraid of being hurt. What you do see is a single mother hugging an eight year old child while she says good bye to the social worker.

She is invisible, but if she weren’t you would see how much she hates herself. You would hear Her telling God that she doesn’t know what love is.  What you do see is a single mother smiling as her two daughters play together. You see her providing opportunities so her daughters never have to feel invisible.

She is invisible, but if she weren’t you would see a little girl crying for all the loss and abandonment she has experienced in her life. You would hear her giving all the pain to God and asking Him to use it. What you do see is a fifty year old woman going through the motions of life amazed every minute of the day by the faithfulness of God.

She is invisible, but if she weren’t she  might see another invisible woman  sitting beside her in church or in the next cubicle at work. She would see that God has gifted her with  many talents that need to be shared with others so that she won’t feel invisible.

She feels invisible much of the time, but God sees her. He sees His daughter whom He loves so much that He sent His son to die for her. He loves her just the way she is, but so much that He can’t let her stay that way.

As I journey on the path of this life, I want to walk with those who feel invisible and help them to see their value.